I don’t know what I’m doing.
I don’t know where I am going.
I know that it’s been a week since my dog fell ill,
three days since her passing,
and I am lost.
I am lost in memories having no sense of time
and I am so unsure of my reality.
I am lost in an unimaginable pain that grips and chokes me
as fast and unexpectedly as her death.
I am lost because so much of me left with her –
Who am I without her?
What do I do without her?
Where do I go without her?
How do I live without her?
When will this sorrow let me go?
I am lost and I am searching, trying to understand –
Why I still hear her in the silence of her absence.
Why I still see her in the empty space of her bed.
I am lost and I am searching for way though this sadness.