An Infinite Moment

One of the things that Buddhist mediation emphasizes is the acceptance of Impermanence, that everything changes, begins and ends, is created and destroyed.  When you first mediate, you open you mind and just let your thoughts wander, let feelings come and go – allow yourself just to be in that moment. But the moments of […]

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Cherishing the Present

We have two labs, 11 and 14.  The 11-year-old lab, Butter, passed away almost three weeks ago.    There are still days when I don’t want to get out of bed or do much of anything, but I have to manage those urges to check out and dwell in my sadness.  For my sake, but more […]

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Unforeseen

It’s the last day of January.  The month opened with such optimism and hope for the New Year, only to end with a silent, cold trepidation.   Last week, our dog passed away.  Today, a family friend lost his long battle with cancer.   A sudden death or a prolonged death – the sadness is […]

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Lighting the Darkness

We all grieve, but we express it differently.  I try to write or do something creative to help me make sense of what I’m feeling.  My mother is a Theravada Buddhist.  Myself?  I’m more of an observer than a believer or practitioner (maybe someday), but I’ve appreciated how other people practice their faith. The day […]

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The Hour of Passing

A cold rain is falling outside, creating puddles in the empty park across the street.  The weather will worsen; rain turning into snow, temperatures dropping. What a cold, wet, desolate day.  A day expected from winter – a day expected and appropriate for mourning. I don’t remember the moment of her passing, but remain haunted […]

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The Eternal Riddle of Time

Time is a precarious thing.  Something we think we know, we think we have; like a fickle lover whose adoration one moment feeds and sustains your soul then obliterates your heart for amusement. For the bereaved, for those of us left behind, the grief is unbearable enough without having to grapple with this eternal riddle […]

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A Way Through Sadness

I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know where I am going. I know that it’s been a week since my dog fell ill, three days since her passing, and I am lost. I am lost in memories having no sense of time and I am so unsure of my reality. I am lost […]

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